i'm just aching to show you pictures from Emory's party but i don't have any yet so you'll just have to be patient along with me. Mom of the year award-- i forgot to bring my camera so my lovely friend Annie let me click away on hers and is being sweet enough to send me a disk because she lives out of town now. As soon as i have them you better believe they will be up for your viewing pleasure :OD
but to the topic at hand.
I'd mentioned before that i am currently reading Forgotten God by Francis Chan. It's so good that it's killing me that i can't just sit down and finish it all at once, things are too busy around here lately for that.
I think i've been lucky enough to have been raise in a family and church that was pretty good about their understanding of the Holy Spirit and it's role. But it's a daily decision to listen to the Spirit's prodding and calling.
It so amazing to have the help and encouragement in times of struggle or attack.
One of my favorite parts of the book thus far has this to say:
....
Jesus Himself said to His disciples, "It is for your good that I am going away. Unless I go away, the Counselor will not come to you; but if I go, I will send Him to you" (John 16:7) So Jesus is basically telling His disciples, "Yes, I was with you for three and a half years, but it is better that I leave you and the Holy Spirit comes to you."
When the disciples heard that two thousand years ago, i'm sure it was hard for them to grasp. How could it be better to trade a human Jesus-- a man they could talk and eat and laugh with-- for a Spirit they couldn't physically see? Thousands of years later, i think most of us would also choose a physical Jesus over an invisible Spirit. BUt what do we do with the fact that Jesus says it is better for His followers to have the Holy Spirit? Do we believe Him? If so, do our lives reflect that belief?...
i'm sure most have us have either thought or discussed with other believers how much easier it would be if we were physically WITH Jesus. Easier to trust, easier to stay faithful, easier to witness. just easier.
But how awesome is it the He provided for us so perfectly by sending the Spirit to literally dwell with in us, to counsel us and comfort us?! Are we taking advantage of this help and are we giving the Spirit full reign in our lives?
I mentioned last week that we went to Kentucky for Uncle Len's funeral. Aunt Irene was sweet enough to put all of us up at their house, as usual. The kids and i were in a large open basement room; Leland and I on the pull out couch (oh the comfort!) and Emory on the far end of the room in her pack in play, behind a half wall to help her be less distracted so she could fall right to sleep. Joel was still @ home the first night because he had to work monday morning.
Sunday night i put the kids to bed, chatted with the cousins and then came down to sleep too. I fell right asleep and was swept up into vivid dreams. In my dreams Joel was being hurt in different ways over and over. A car crash, something chasing him, something beating him, darkness everywhere, pure terror and despair. I finally woke up. I'm used to have weird, disturbing dreams, either from food, tv, stress or being over tired. Usually i pray, sometimes i analyze where certain aspects of my dreams relate to things that happened during the day, and generally just calm down and go back to sleep.
I did those things, thinking i was just worried about him being there while we in KY and tried to go back to sleep. I couldn't. I just couldn't shake this feeling that something was actually wrong. i felt like if i didn't pray hard something terrible would happen. I told myself i was just being silly but i prayed anyway. Then i shot Joel a text saying "are you okay?! had a urgent feeling to pray for you." He called me with in seconds.
Minutes earlier he was leaving the church after spending most of the evening working on the computer/sound system trying to get things ready for worship the following sunday. When he was leaving he said that the darkness just seemed to swallow him, and he felt this uneasy, terrible feeling come over him. He tried to write it off as that feeling you get when you are somewhere quiet and dark by yourself but it was different, it felt aggressive and bad. He started to pray and that was when he got my text.
we continued to pray for the next hour as he went home and i tried to calm down to go back to sleep. We hung up so we wouldn't wake up the kids and i again felt the darkness closing in around me. I went to get Emory to put her in bed with me and Leland, held them tight and sang hymns into the wee hours. Joel texted me the verse "You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world. John 4:4" and i was able to slip into a peaceful sleep after that.
now, let me assure you, we aren't crazy. we aren't doing cartwheel's down the isle at church during our worship service, we don't often have stories of intense physical- spiritual warfare. (no offense meant if you are a cartwheeling worshipper)
But this was real. I'm so thankful for the call to pray and the peace and protection that was given.
I hope you don't write me off as a lune, because i had to share!
This past Sunday was Joel's first week leading worship at Copper Creek. It was a doozy of a week getting ready. Because of being out of town for the funeral he had a shortened work week as far as days, not so much hours.
He went to his full time job from 6-3, came home and showered, kissed the kids and then worked at the church until at least 11 every night, wednesday - friday. then he stayed up till almost 2am at home on friday night working on slides and finished them up saturday morning before Emory's party. We came back from her party and he, you guessed it, headed back over to the church for saturday evening.
It was worth it! It went really well, other than some technical difficulties (sound guy didn't show, ancient glitchy computer, mic malfunction) and was well received. You will never make everyone %100 happy but he did a great job of selecting songs and making everyone comfortable no matter their preference.
For me, there was an equally exciting part of the service--
the Hutton Family was there!
The Hutton's are Theron, Sarah, Campbell(5), Claire(3?), Nolan(2) and Lydia(7 months). They are currently missionaries to the Ankole people in Mbarara, Uganda. They have been there for 2 years now and have 8 more years of their 10 year commitment to fulfill. Copper Creek supports their family while they are there and they are back in the states for 2 (ish) months to visit their families, support churches and get legal/medical things caught up (licenses, immunizations etc).
Theron was able to tell us about the work that they are doing there and how God is working in the Ankole people's lives. It was so amazing to hear all about it. PLease click on the link above to read their blog and get excited about what's going on! i know they covet your prayers!
The whole time i was listening a little voice in my head was saying "if they can do it, you can do it! eventually you can!"
Shall i explain? okay, the short version, it's a deal.
I have wanted to go to Africa for a LONG time. I've felt the pull towards mission work on that continent for years. I took swahili for a short time my senior year of high school from the Missions Professor at SLCC, who lived and worked in Africa for over 20 years. When i married Joel he had less than no interest in ever going to Africa. He wanted to do youth or music ministry. We had babies which doesn't scream "go to Africa". i have continued to pray that *eventually* i would get to serve in this way.
Over the past 6 years Joel has softened towards Africa, with out me pushing him in that direction. We've heard different speakers on the topic, had different friends go, etc. We had the conversation that it would be really cool to get to the stage in our life where that's what God wanted from us.
Listening to Theron i started hoping again that this would be so in our lives. I was brought to tears multiple times during the service. (not hard to believe i know)
After church we got to go out to eat with Theron, Sarah and the kids (minus Claire who didn't feel well). Sarah is just a joy to visit with! we could have talked all day. Did you do the math and figure out that Lydia was born in Uganda? May i just mention that Theron is a doctor and delivered her himself, in their home? yes. yes they did.
We talked about homeschooling curriculum, the kids, things they missed, etc etc. I confided that I've been itching to go to Africa and i hoped that we could come before they left.
A little later in the conversation Theron started telling Joel about this strange problem he hadn't expected to encounter in Uganda. He said there is this infatuation in the church there with the Western worship music. Many of the churches "in town" are quitting the traditional African style of music and attempting to copy our western concepts. Only VERY badly. no one is good and they just make it as loud as possible to attract attention. He said it just broke his heart that instead of hearing the beautifully rhythmic african voices raising worship you would hear only blaring misplayed notes. He went on to say that he really wished that they could have someone who knew sound and music come and show them that louder isn't necessarily better, how to blend the two styles, how to join the voices and the music with balance.
Yup, you guessed it. The entire time i was raising my eyebrows at Joel and grinning from ear to ear. How. Perfect. we aren't doctors, we don't have big fancy degrees. But oh how our hearts ache for these people. I can help with the practical healthy living they are teaching to the villagers and Joel can help with the music conundrum.
Now, simmer down, we aren't planning on picking up and leaving tomorrow. Or even next year.
We are hoping that as we continue following God's leading that He will make clear to us a time and season for this trip to take place. We don't know the duration, or if it will certainly happen, but definitely feel lead in that direction.
WAHOO!
Do i find the idea of being bordered by war torn and politically hostile countries a bit scary? yes. Would i be nervous about taking our children all that way into those circumstances? yes. Equally worried about leaving them here at home? yes. but consider this other quote from Forgotten God:
.... So, if you say you want the Holy Spirit, you must first honestly ask yourself if you want to do His will. Because if you do not genuinely want to know and do His will, why should you ask for His presence at all? But if you decide you do want to know His will, there will be moments when you have to let go of the fear of what that might mean--when you have to release your grip of control on your life and decide to be led, come what may...*deep content sigh*
